Off topic: turned away by dating agency because I stitch.

[Mystonique]

I am 34 and have been single since my early 20's (save for a very bad 12 months recently). I have lots of wonderful friends but they are all married with toddlers and don't know any single people. I'm starting to feel extremely lonely since my Dad passed away. So I have been looking for singles group activities. I have been horrified to find that these things are TRIPLE or more the price that the same activity would normally cost. After months of looking I finally found a place that organises reasonably priced dinners for 6 (3 men, 3 women) but when I was going through the interview the woman was so dismissive of me and when I said I did tapestry she smarmily whined "Tapestry??? Who does tapestry? No, I don't think this is for you, try playing tennis or something".

I know this sounds silly but I cried hysterically all the way home. It was sort of my last hope ={ It's certainly knocked any confidence I had built up since my break up right out of me, I'm feeling rather despondent and hopeless about it all.

[Rose]

What a bitch. Who is she to turn her nose up at a craft that she obviously knows nothing about. I am so sorry that you had to find such a snob. If she had any idea of the beautiful items you created she would be stunned. I would say that you would not have been happy in the group if they are this inconsiderate. I would not let them deter you from continuing to look for a social group that you would fit into. Don't let ignorant pople mess with your head.

[dwitt]

I am so sorry that happened to you. For someone to dismiss you b/c of a hobby is ignorant. She has no idea the creativity that you have to do this craft.

Sending you lots of

[Zeb]

My god what a narrow minded person that woman is!!!!

I am so SO sorry this happened to you and I want you to BELIEVE that this wasn't an issue at all with you, but with a woman who probably shouldn't be doing ANY job that involves interacting with other humans.

Also, I do understand the lonely aspect. I've been single for a long time, and would love to have the whole "Fall in love live happily ever after" thing but it's just never happened for me.

[kell]

That group is obviously NOT for you, because anyone worth knowing would have said, "Ooh, tapestry? That sounds interesting! Can you tell me more about it, please? I'm sure others will find that interesting too!" What an evil b*tch to be so smarmy! How does she now what will and won't interest other people? How does she know that there's not a guy in that very group who secrety stitches and would LOVE a lovely lady to share his hobby? If that's her attitude, I'm sure none of the guys would have admitted to stitching either!

[Nachstenliebe]

Ouch.. well now you know why they were so cheap.. because I'm sure that lady finds flaws in everyone and no is allowed to go I would have been just as upset. Is there someone above her you can talk to, let them know of her "standards" when interviewing people?
Faith

[Cecilia]

What a stuck up cow! She's got no right to speak to you like that! Anyway it just shows how ignorant she is. I agree with Faith; sounds like she shouldn't be dealing with people. It might be worth complaining about her attitude to her boss, if she has one.

Here's a hug, please don't beat yourself up about this. They're obviously not worth it.

[Like_Fine_VVine]

I'm so sorry you had to experience that and I don't blame you for being upset. I agree with others that at the end of the day its probably for the best that you found out so early, because if she's indicative of the group- its not the right one for you. I also agree that she shouldn't be in a job that interacts with humans. Maybe she'd make a better zoo manager ... but those poor animals probably don't deserve that either.

I'm sure everyone in life finds themselves in the position you are in now- the feeling lonely part. Even people in relationships find themselves there . Keep enjoying life and making yourself available and the universe will bring special friends and maybe more into your life to stop that loneliness just when you least expect it . Till then...

[shjordon]

There is obviously something wrong with that woman! Don't let her get you down, there is nothing wrong with you or your hobby! You wouldn't want to belong to such a judgemental group anyway.

[pamelam]

What an odd thing for that woman to have said. What sense does that make? Please try to not let her get you down. It's not worth it!

[Zannaxs]

The cheeky mare, I am speechless. Can you not get another interview but with someone different, I would be reporting the cheeky bitch, who does she think she is.

I hope your good and mad now, do not let her put you down, get back in touch, tell them what happened, maybe they are unaware of this nasty broad and how she treats prospective clients.

Mavis

[Charmed]

Im quite frankly stunned at such bizzare behaviour!! but I second everyone elses commnents..... your so much better off somewhere else! but also sorry you had the misfortune to meet somebody like her! x

[Wandatoo]

Just out of curiousity, how old was the woman who interviewed you? Wonder where she got her ideas about stitching. Besides, if you want to pay for the service, who is she to refuse you, especially on such stupid grounds.

[K1nS]

What a cow!! By the sounds of it hun, your best off not having anything to do with them if thats the way they treat people I can't beleive she was so rude to you!

[Mystonique]

Thank you so much for all the encouragement ... sadly she was the owner of the business so no one to complain to. I imagine that her response was what it was because she already has way too many 30 something girls on her books but even so, no need to be rude.

I rang a friend of mine after posting and he gave me a good belly laugh so I am feeling a bit better.

Really though it dismays me the way people respond to less common pursuits (I also target shoot and sometimes get flack for it- didn't get far enough to tell her about that lol).

Honestly you would think a respectable gentleman would kill for a good woman that knew how to sew these days =}

[Kute Kitty]

"Tapestry??? Who does tapestry?"

Some of the nicest people I know, that's who! It's their loss of course, they won't get a wonderful, engaging woman on their books to meet all their nice young men who are just looking for a lady who has interesting hobbies to talk about, they'll be stuck with bimbos without a single brain cell in their heads. Poor fellas.

[maggs]

So sorry you had such a bad experience and who is she turn her nose up at ones hobbies.






I have an available male in my house who is domesticated and fully understands people who stitch and will even give you all the encourengment you need.

[Mabel Figworthy]

*is speechless for a while* What an astonishing thing to say! Please believe that there are plenty of men out there who appreciate a woman who has interesting hobbies, and who will take an interest in them.
I'm sorry it feels as though your last chance has been taken, and I don't want to sound as though I'm making light of it -- I was single in my thirties and tried sites to find like-minded men but had some bad experiences (nothing past the writing stage, but upsetting nonetheless), and eventually found my DH when I met up with a group of members of the Flanders & Swann forum I subscribe too -- a group that was nothing to do with dating or finding a partner, just lots of people sharing an interest. Perhaps joining a target shooting website might bring you into contact with people who like the smae things as you?

[burgundyice]

The first thing I would say is I bet their men aren't up to much if ladies have to be screened to make sure they have NO INTERESTS WHATSOEVER!!!

[quote="Mabel Figworthy] eventually found my DH when I met up with a group of members of the Flanders & Swann forum I subscribe too -- a group that was nothing to do with dating or finding a partner, just lots of people sharing an interest. Perhaps joining a target shooting website might bring you into contact with people who like the smae things as you?[/quote]

I advise this too - it's how I met my OH as well (a Duran Duran forum ) If you start off with a common interest other than I-am-single-and-looking-for-someone you'll have some conversation starters to begin with.

Louise

[mig-3]

A stitcher and shooter?! Be still my heart........ The decent, appreciative men are out there. We're having the same problem finding the ladies. I empathize with you. It seems incredibly difficult to meet people these days, especially if you aren't already part of "the scene". Have faith. You obviously have a wealth of things going for you. Some lucky guy will "click" and you'll both be the better for the wait.

Older, ugly, poor and, yes, single....