Stitchy Dilema

[Ceitidh]

My two girls have been asking why I have stitched birth samplers for other people but have never done one for either of them. I would like to stitch something small for each of them but have a dilema.

My eldest (who turned 15 at the weekend) was an identical twin but her sister only survived for 8 hours after they were born. In my heart, if I were to stitch anything I would want to stitch for all of them. I don't want people to think it's weird if I were to put 3 samplers on the wall, but I don't want to miss her out either.

I'm sorry if this seems a stupid question but what would you do? I feel as though I am being stupid but in my heart I still have 3 girls, not 2 and feel it would be like forgetting her if I didn't stitch for them all.

Sorry for the miserable post, having a weepy day or two and just wondered what other people who understood what stitching something special means thought about stitching such a thing and puting it on the wall.

Does anybody know of any good websites with baby sampler patterns ?

[Serinde]

Ceitidh, you are the mother of three. You should be very proud.

Now. A friend of mine lost her first boy when he was tiny, like your daughter. Well, she did a chart for him, the same as for his three later brothers. Whenever anyone works up the courage to ask who James is... she is very happy to speak about it.

You design or stitch whatever you feel is appropriate to honour your children.

[RosemaryH]

You are 100% right to be thinking of stitching 3 not 2 samplers. You are the mother of 3 not 2 so if you are stitching for the 2 that survived you would feel like you were denying that you had another baby. My daughter had twins who died and she has photo´s of them on the wall and their birth samplers which she stitched in the first year after their deaths. Obviously she cried tons whilst stiching the samplers but said that she would not have felt right if she had not done this for them. Her 2 other children have their samplers on their walls and the twins samplers and photo´s are in the hall for all to see.

Rosemary

[nettie]

I agree too I'm not a mum but I am a daughter and if I were your daughter I would be proud to know you remember all your children. She may only have been with you in body for a short time but in spirit she is there for all your life! Celebrate her too!

[RosemaryH]

Forgot to ask you whether the girls will be choosing thier own samplers or whether you are going to surprise them. If they are choosing will you get them to help with ideas for the sampler for the little one you lost?

Rosemary

[Charmed]

I totally agree with everybody else, you should do three and not two, its a lovely thought

[karen4bells]

I totally agree with everyone else! You are the mom to 3 daughters and can see no issues at all with stitching one for each of them

[Ceitidh]

Thank you so so much for your replies. Am glad it doesn't sound stupid to do one for each of them.

Not sure what I will stitch yet, going to surf for ideas as I want to do ones that are subtle, not too big so I can group them together and not too 'cute' either.

Thank you.

[Red]

Hope you can find what you are looking for! You'll know it when you see it.

I agree with everyone else as well. Having 3 samplers is a wonderful idea.

[kell]

It's a lovely idea to stitch for all three of your beautiful girls.

[Rose]

Late as far as advise of if you should. But if in your heart you have a strong feeling that you want to stitch a sampler for all three then there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. No matter the age of your child when you lost her she was still yours and left a mark on your heart. I think it is beautiful to want to remember her in a special way.

[maggs]

Sorry for coming in late on this, but why not get the whole family involved in choosing the sampler for your daughter/sister held in your hearts.

[Jaki :)]

Definately agree with the others & what better way 2 remember & celebrate them all xxxx

[bluenoseshelley]

this is a lovely idea i think its wonderful that you will stitch three samplers as you are mother to three lovely daughters and there all very special to you as far as ideas go have you considered making a twins sampler and putting both names on or do you definately want three totally separate ones maybe the surviving twin might like something that shows she is one of two?
as a surving twin myself i think its a lovely idea (my mum lost my twin at 3 months but they managed to save me)
i think if my mum were a cross stitcher she would want to make four samplers too one for me my twin we lost and one each for my older brother and sister

[Ceitidh]

I personally would like to have something that was individual to each of them, but perhaps the eldest would prefer something that was for both of them. Would need to approach that carefully.

Can see me ending up doing them a cute one each for the girls themselves and then doing the 3 individual ones in a different style for myself.