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Turned out my issue was my needle, it was to blunt at the point that it wouldn't go through the fabric without a fight. I switched needles to one with a sharper point and all is, mostly, well. The fabric is still stiffer than I would like. If I owned an iron I would try to iron it. lol Thanks for the suggestions!

I see that you've posted this a while ago, but what I do to loosen my aida is I just ball it up, scrunch it up, and keep doing that and working it every which way til it's more pliable. Unless it's a small thing that'll only fit in a small hoop, then I just leave it.