Not sure what to do, but I need to vent

[K1nS]

So as a few of you know, I work in Burger King, fulltime and its crap lol

Anyway, i've always had trouble with one of the assistant managers since I started (last Nov) but its never been anything big, well nothing to tell anyone about other than my fiance. Then yesterday I gave out the wrong burger, totally by accident and he went mad at me, I said sorry and thought nothing of it. Then he wanted to get to a small fridge that is on the floor but I was stuck infront of it getting something else, he asked me to 'scuse me but somehow my brain didn't take it in fast enough to move quick (if that makes sense) so he then went 'MOVE' and hit the fridge door in my leg, not hard but enough to shock me. Dean (boyfriend) was in there having his dinner and later on when I went to clean the tables, he could tell there was something wrong with me and wanted to know, so I told him. He went mad, as you can imagine and when the manager went out from front counter, he pulled him to one side and had a go at him. I totally thought he was going to hit him so I had to calm him down After all this, the manager called me into the office and asked what it was all about so I explained that I felt he treated me differently to everyone else and its just little things but he can be really nasty to me. He then said he was sorry and didn't mean to hit me with the fridge door and asked if I wanted to go home, as I was really worked up.

I went back in today as normal, he wasn't there but a few people wanted to know what went on. One girl told me that when she was pregnant, the same manager pushed her and her boyfriend went mad aswel.

I'm not sure what I want to do, I mean he said he was sorry etc. and last night I thought that was it but after hearing that he did that to the other girl, I don't know if I should write to head office or something to stop him doing it to someone else

[Nachstenliebe]

woah...pretty serious, especially when he's been in the situation before. Personally if it were me, I would wait to see if he does it again.. then take action, but that's just me....
Faith

[K1nS]

Thats a good idea, I think I might do that. I would feel bad taking it further now as we kinda made up yesterday...

[karen4bells]

He def sounds like he needs a bit of counseling or something. I do hope that he doesn't ever do that again. So sorry to hear you've had that happen

[K1nS]

Thanks

[*barb*]

personally, as awful as it was for you, if you want to keep your job, i would let it go and leave it to someone else. if the other person who had been in the same situation had reported it, it would not have happened to you. But they did not. Why should you put your job in jepody for someone else to be protected when no one did that for you? I know this may sound selfish to some people, but at the end of the day, if you really need that job, and all is sorted, let it go and dont speak about it.

That is what i would do, look out for myself. Sometimes, if you report these things, which is the correct thing to do, they have a way of back firing on you and making your life hellish..do you want that is what you need to ask your self.

[Jaki :)]

Sounds like he needs anger management to me x he said sorry this time but I don't think I'd be taking it if it happened again esp as he's been nasty to someone else too, he might think that saying sorry gets him off the hook all the time x Sorry to hear your going thru this hope he is sorry & u get some peace

[willow]

Why don't you write down the date and what happened to you and the other lady in a note book (also her name), then if he does it to someone else you have a record and then you can take it further.

[K1nS]

Barb, I totally understand what your saying there and it does make sense The last thing I would want is for things to get worse and your right, I do need that job.

Thanks Jaki x

And willow, its in my diary already just incase

[Vega]

Would the other employee be willing to go to upper management with you? There is absolutely no excuse for his behavior. We all have bad days, but as a manager, some lines are not to be crossed. Yes, he said he was sorry, but so does every other abusive person out there. Does it mean it won't happen again? No. Does it mean he is sincerely apologetic? No. What it means is he got caught, confronted, and has to cover his butt.

Keep a record, and if it happens again DO go to upper management. I understand it could put your job at risk, but isn't it worth it to take a stand against wrong behavior?

[kell]

Keep a note of each incident as it happens, noting exactly what happened, when and where, and also who witnessed it. Put it all on paper and complain to a manager above him. It's the only way. Most companies take a zero-tolerance approach to bullying and harrassment. I actually volunteered to be a witness for a colleague this very evening after someone one step above her had a go at her for no good reason - right in front of customers too. It as absolutely uncalled for, extremely unprofessional and very, very uncomfortable to see. The lass in question has a history of treating people like sh*t. She tried it on with me my 2nd day and I set her straight, telling her I wouldn't be spoken to that way - ever since then she's been nice as pie ot me as she knows I won't tolerate it, but the girl she harrassed tonight is only 18 and doesn't have as much confidence to stand up for herself as I do. She did tell me she was writing a letter of complaint as soon as she got home tonight though, so I hope she doesn't back out of doing it coz that other lass has got it coming to her from what I've witnessed in the few days I've been working there!

Anyway, after all that rambling, all I really want to say is this - nobody has the right to berate or belittle you at work. If management has issue with anything you do, they should take you to the office and talk to you privately in a calm manner - that is the professional way to deal with it. Anything else can be seen as demeaning and unprofessional.

[Sarah Gixxer]

The manager has no right at all to treat you like that (or the other girl he pushed). I'm glad you made a note of the date it happened. Speaking to you like that and hitting your leg with the fridge door is abuse and pushing the pregnant girl is absolutely outrageous.

If there is someone else in authority who you can speak to, I would definitely do that. You have a right to feel comfortable and unthreatened in your working environment and you also have every right to ensure it doesn't happen to you again (or to anyone else).

For myself personally, I would complain about it. At the end of the day if this manager takes exception to having himself complained about, he'll only make things worse for himself if he says or does anything else. Perhaps the other girl would be willing to speak up as well if you both reported it together. They can't fire you for complaining that you've been treated badly.

[Kute Kitty]

Definitely keep a log of everything he does which is inappropriate, including as much detail as possible (if you can, the exact words he uses) and including details of everyone who witnesses it. The fact that he's let you leave early and apologised means nothing in my eyes - it's a poor apology for months of unpleasantness. The fact that your colleague has also had a physical altercation with him, while she was pregnant, strengthens your case against him. Hopefully the two of you can report him to more senior management together (if his manager won't do anything about it, go to their manager - go as high as you need in order to get a response!) and get something done. You can ask to not be identified to him when he is confronted about the complaints made against him by staff, he can't retaliate against you because to be honest, if he's given a dressing-down for being too hard on the staff then just comes down harder, it's just going to generate more complaints from the staff and get him into more trouble. Your log of events is important though, if you go to management and say "I've got a problem with Mr B" then the first thing they're going to say is where's your evidence - because without evidence it's just your word against his. Well done for putting it in your diary already!

They can't fire you for complaining. They will have policies in place against bullying, so they will be able to take disciplinary action against him for bullying staff - especially when the bullying has become physical, and on at least one occasion has been directed against a pregnant woman.

[maggs]

Abuse of any one in any form is not to be tolarated. I quiet understand your position about needing the job, but is there not someone else that you could mention it to? Perhaps now your boyfriend stood up to him on your behalf things may be OK.

[*barb*]

i reported a guy at work for bullying me and others and to this day wish i never did. he did end up resigning as he knew his days were numbered but i spent a few weeks of hell..prank phone calls, looking over my back..he threatened to come to my house and get me...i even got as far as doing a prelim police report.

if i were in the same situation there is no way i would go through it again. i would leave well alone after the hell i went through and that is why i gave the advice i gave, which i know is not the best.

the manager where i work knew this was happening, others were too scared to report him officially, i went over the manager to the one above...i think she was glad i did because i think she was too scared herself and thats why it got so bad.

even had to change my phone number...

[vanessanjf]

I would report him and then you could get shot of him. If not I'm sure he will treat you better and think what he is doing more!

[ali-cat]

I fully understand where barb is coming from as I was once given a terrible time by a supervisor when I had a Saturday job, as a teenager. It constantly got worse until she reduced me to tears in front of customers - and then I reported her to the manager. For me it was problem solved as she didn't bother me again, but we still had to work together and it was very uncomfortable.

This assistant manager and you may have already cleared the air as you have told him how you feel - but as everyone else has said, keep a record and if anything happens again you will have all the information to take it further, if you wish. Good luck.

[K1nS]

Thanks for everyones replies. I have had more time to think about it now and I think I will be leaving it as it is for now. The other girl who he pushed seems fine about it now, it was around 4 years ago and now everything is fine between them so i'm not sure she would take it further now. Of course, if anything else happens then I will deffinatly have to do something about it, I think though tbh, Dean scaired him alot (he did me!) so fingers crossed thats enough to keep him off my back

[K1nS]

After giving this more thought and chatting to a few people. I have actually decided to take it further. I found out this morning that our area manager is working with us today so I am in the middle of writing a formal complaint letter to pass on to him about the situation. I will let you know if anything else happens later on

[Mabel Figworthy]

Good luck!